It has been an interesting week. Still no official word on Eli (although there is rumor that he is just partying with some friends here in LA, or with his brother). Sad Girl has made some really poor decisions but is still set on coming back to the program. Hopefully she can hold on for 23 more days.

In addition to that, four kids ran from the program yesterday - two boys and two girls. One of each came back, but the other two spent the night out on the streets together. They came back this morning and are both being dismissed from the program. My heart is so broken right now. The girl that is leaving is one that I was so close to. I see so much of myself in her. It is so hard to watch someone you love so much make so many of the same stupid decisions you made as a kid (a little taste of parenthood I guess). I just want her to believe that she is beautiful and valuable. But she doesn't. She thinks she is trash and that the world would just be better without her so she continually makes trashy decisions. If she could only she how precious she is I know she would choose life, but she doesn't. I knew she was going to run. On Thursday I told Cami that she would, I just didn't think it would come so soon. I thought I might have more time with her, but I don't. I am glad this is all coming out now. She is young and if she chooses to begin dealing with the lies that bind her now, she will discover freedom soon.
Her parents live a little ways away, so I did get to spend the morning with her and say goodbye. I just wish it could have been a happier ending. Her parents are sending her to a lock down facility now. It is hard to watch, but we all know it is what she needs. I just hope she believes in herself enough to actually make it through.

A Call to Prayer

One of our students is missing. He is from Montana and was on the bus home to visit his family, but no one has heard from him since Wednesday. He was a student about ready to graduate the discipleship program and he is 18. He got on the bus at noon on Wednesday, with $100 and a calling card. He called his grandma on Wednesday and said he was on his way, but did not tell her where he was. He was supposed to arrive home on Thursday morning but no one has seen him. His uncle missed a call from a pay phone two blocks from the greyhound station in Portland.

His name is Eli, he is native American. Please help us as we search for this young man. Because he is an adult and considered a graduate of the program, there is not a whole lot we can do legally, but we have informed the police. Please pray for Eli, his safety and that we find him soon.

I know it's not a great picture, but it at least gives you an idea :)

Eli in the back playing his flute.

In addition, I ran into Sad Girl at church today (check the blog titles Blessings to read about her). She was really bummed today because (as she put it) she really messed up. She left the program a couple of days ago and is really regretting it. She talked with her leaders and they have a policy that you have to wait 30 days before you can re-enter. She is really scared to mess up some more and greatly desires to be back in the program. Although I am worried about her, she seems to be making good decisions at the moment and I was refreshed by our conversation. She is already a different person. This is the first time I have been able to talk to her in two months. Her countenance is different. She is more talkative and less sorrowful. There is just a new presence about her, she is peaceful. Please cover her in prayer as she has to walk through the consequences of her most recent mistake. Please pray that this time will pass quickly for her and that she will be back in a process of healing soon.

Thank you for loving these kids with us and fighting for them alongside us. I will update you on both Eli and Sad Girl as soon as I can.

Hooray!!!

Today my runaway came back! I was so excited to see him, although he definitely thinks that what he did was kinda funny, and feels like he mentally has started the program over from the beginning...I'm still glad that he came back!

Prayer

I'm really bummed right now. The hard part about being so immersed in ministry is that you really start to feel like a parent. Not that I know what's best for these kids, or have all the answers, but I really do care about them. Which is why when kids make dumb decisions it's really hard to stand by and watch. It's a great picture of Christ, but right now, unfortunately, that doesn't really make it feel any less sucky.

On Saturday night a student that I have been close to for the last 6 months, a student that I love a lot, that loves me a lot, decided that he didn't want to be in the discipleship program anymore, so he RAN from church... just left. I know it sounds a little anti-climatic but you have to understand that running away from the program is the same thing as deciding to get back into the drugs and alcohol and gangs and girls that he has been able to stay away from for the last 6 months. It makes me really sad because he was doing SO well. It was very much like he just gave into the attacks of the evil one. If you could join me in covering this little one with prayer I would appreciate it.

Blessings!!!

Bri and I on the roof of the Dream Center with LA in the background.









Making breakfast in Ro's kitchen.









Fun times at a rodeo with the best friends a girl could ever ask for!


Blessing #1

Two weeks ago my good friend Bri drove all the way down from Portland to visit us and experience our lives here in LA. We were so honored to have her come all that way to see us, and I was especially blessed by her presence. We didn't do anything extravagant, we just spent time together. It was so refreshing to be around someone I feel so known by and that I know so well. There is depth to our friendship that I do not experience here with my friend yet. Bri and I have shared so many dreams and passions, intimate times in prayer that it just feels safe and comfortable to be around one another. It truly is a gift to have friends like her.

Blessing #2

We got to go to Oregon for my father's 50th birthday party!! We weren't there long, so we didn't get to see many of you that we miss so dearly, but we did get to see most of the family, including Cami's side. Ryan and Nelle (who live is Japan) flew to the northwest the same day we did, so Cami's parents picked them up and then we all went down to Salem together to hang out with Ro. It was a quick day, but so wonderful to be with family. Sorry we didn't have more time to see the rest of you. :(

Blessing #3

There is a young lady I want to tell you about. For the sake of this story I am going to refer to her by her street name, "Sad Girl". Sad Girl is a 19 year old mother who has had a life you would not wish upon your worst enemy. When I first began at the Dream Center, I think it was her mission to make my life as difficult as possible. So I just hugged her all the time, continually told her how much I loved her and just lavished her with affection. She never really hugged back, but I know she enjoyed it. Unfortunately, do to a whole bunch of things, she was kicked out of the school in April. In the last few weeks that Sad Girl was in my classroom, every day she spent the majority of the day at my side. She was so depressed and suicidal I couldn't even trust her with staples. We had many conversations about the fact that hurting herself hurt me, I don't think she fully understood how true those words word but she definitely hoped they were. Anyway, back to the blessing. After Sad Girl got kicked out of school she talked of entering our women's discipleship program . She wanted to join the teen home, but being 19, she was too old. The women's home is a year long commitment and Sad Girl really struggled. At times she would tell us she was going in the next day and then text a teacher, "not doing it, dancing with the devil." Or "the devil has got my heart forever." But it finally happened!!!! Two and a half weeks ago Sad Girl checked herself into the program!! She is still in her orientation period, so we cannot speak to her yet, but I see her around a couple times a week. And the most amazing part is, she smiles!!! Not just a little grin, but a full on smile, teeth exposed and all. I have prayed so may times that she would experience joy and freedom and I can see the joy all over her face!! Sad Girl is no longer sad!!!!!!!! I wish I were better with words. I wish you could understand what a victory it is just to she her smile. I am speechless. What else can I say.
Please do pray for her. Discipleship is not an easy program and many back out. She is close to her neighborhood, which sometimes makes it more difficult to stick with the program. She needs everyone on her side, fighting for her heart. I truly believe she is a conquerer and we will continue to have great stories about the changes that God is doing in her. Thank you for rejoicing with us.

so, for those of you who like American Idol, you should check out Nashville Star and support our boy Coffey. he is a member of our church and just an all around great guy. check it out mondays at 9pm on nbc and don't forget to vote for him.

here is a video of him with our worship team.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMmM0jBk1Zw&NR=1

A few issues i have been wrestling with

Milk vs Steak
During my years at bible college, especially my senior year, my fellow students and I were continually warned by our professors not to become snobby bible college grads. And I fear that I might not have heeded that warning so well.

Cami and I are so blessed to be a part of a church that is truly transforming lives. Every time we gather all I have to do is talk to the person next to me or look up to the balcony and I see at least 100 people who were hopeless but are now finding hope here. My church is an odd mix of extremely wealthy (not to mention extremely generous) people and those at the bottom end of poverty. The whole mission of our church is to bring in those the rest of society has given up on, give them a place to belong and a place to get back their feet and hopefully find Jesus in the process. That is why I love my church so much. But that means that the sermons are milk to the spiritually immature. Sundays often tend to feel like motivational meetings. I just feel that we could be giving more substance to our people. But perhaps this is my selfish desire to be fed myself. How much meat do you bring to the immature?

I guess I have just found myself in a place where church is no longer a time to be fed, but a time to encourage those around me. It is a time to come together and make sure we are still all on the same page - knowing that everything we do is for the hopeless. I must continually remind myself of the youth pastor's words, "Why don't you every find steak on a kids menu? Because if you want it, you need to be able cut it up and eat it yourself."


Wealth and Poverty
Cami and I recently watched an episode of the show 30 Days. It was created by the same guy who did the movie Supersize Me. The premise of the show is to spend 30 days in the life of someone else. In this particular episode, the main character and his fiancee move to Columbus, OH and get minimum wage jobs to discover what it is like to be amongst the thousands of working poor in the USA. For 30 days they lived in a dumpy apartment in a dangerous part of town, relied on public transportation and were without health care. The man ended up get two full time jobs, spending an average of 18 hours a day away from home and his fiancee walked to work to save the 2.70 it would cost them in bus fare.

In addition to the harsh reality of how difficult life in the shoes of the working poor actually is, this episode also brings up some rather disturbing statistics. From 1997 to 2007 Congress did not raise minimum wage a single penny, but received cost of living increases of their own, to the tune of $27,000. How can we live in the richest country in the world and have so many people struggling from day to day. I live in a city full of people hoping to survive from one day to the next, when less than ten miles away live people who have abundantly more than they could ever need and continually gain more. Why is it that the rich just get richer and the poor never seem to get a break? Greed is so ugly! And I wonder how much of it is in me. Why can I not be more like my friend Andrea who gives everything she has away? Why do I need a nice home and nice clothes? Is it wrong of me to desire to own a home some day? Do I really need to own a home, could that money help turn someone's life around, give them the break they have been waiting for?

Now I know owning a home is an exercise of financial wisdom, but what about all the other things I so desperately "need", like my new indoor soccer shoes. When does it become greedy and selfish ambition? Do any of you ever ask these questions? Lord, am I faithful with all that you bless me with?